Two Thumbs up for Tubing!

Today we took James tubing for the first time today. Our first run was not a good one because I didn't lean back enough and we tipped forward and went spilling into the water. Thank goodness for life jackets! James bobbed back up and was terrified. So that was round one. The second round I went alone and showed James that we wouldn't tip anymore. I enjoyed it so much except my bottom hitting off the water :)...even with padding it hurts :). Finally we convinced James to trust us to ride again. So I leaned WAY back and off we went. James LOVED it. He insisted on wearing his swim mask to block the water out :). I kept asking him if he wanted to stop and he looked at me and said "when I want to stop I'll tell YOU"! He cracks me up!! We rode for a while and then decided to let Daddy take a turn. he told me to keep it at about 20 mph but it felt like we were barely moving so I vamped it up to 35 mph...finally I got the signal to slow down so I did. Then James was feeling brave and said he wanted to ride alone so we let him and went super slow. He didn't last but maybe 5 min and was ready to come back to the boat. But he gave it a try which was awesome. James wasn't too keen on swimming in the river at first but of course as it was time to leave he wanted to swim. We told him we'd come back another day to swim because we had to get Ethan at MMO today. Those few hours of just focusing on James while Ethan is at MMO is very  nice. I know he appreciates it as well.By the end of our time on the river, we got TWO thumbs up!!

Ethan-10 months

I cannot believe that 10 months has passed since we brought our baby boy home!! In 2 short months we will be celebrating his 1 year birthday and it is bittersweet. Ethan has been a TOTALLY different baby than James ever was. I dont' know if God helps block out the "bad" stuff with the first so you will have more or what but James seems like an angel baby compared to Ethan. Here it is 10 months later and he still cries a lot, very clingy to me and still wakes up several times throughout the night making my days very long. He has recently had a dual ear infection for over a month so I know that has some bearings on his behavior. We have a referral to an ENT in the works so I am SO thankful to get some kind of answers and hopefully relief for him. Ethan is the worst medicine taker...unlike James at this age. Shawn and I both have to hold Ethan down and tilt his head to get meds in him. It almost is comical how strong this little guy is. Ethan really likes real food much more over baby food. He loves waffles, bananas, pudding, jello, french toast sticks, cheerios just to name a few. For some reason the baby food makes him scream and I don't know why?! Maybe it's his way of telling us that he is ready to bump it up to big boy food all the time :). He is a crawling pro and scoots around rather fast. He loves to get into James room and play with his toys.....James doesn't like it so much but he is learning to give him a toy in order to keep him away from his train table! So funny. Ethan has more of a personality now and does smile more than he did before that's for sure but he is a very demanding baby at times. Anyone who asks me about a 3rd baby should be shot :). NO NO NO is the answer. The only way is if we adopt later on down the road but this mommy knows her limits and isn't willing to push them :)

I am still battling mother's guilt and wonder if it will get any better. Ethan is so time consuming that when I am not dealing with him I am so tired that I feel I often don't pay James the attention he deserves. That is still so hard on me and I wonder how to make it better. I do my best juggling them and feel confident most of the time but I miss James time. I also feel guilty taking any time for myself in which I have to ask for anyone, including Shawn, to watch the boys. If it wasn't for the wonderful daycare at the gym I probably wouldn't even get that time to myself. But I know that they will be in school before I know it wishing I had this time back with them!

Baby Dedication

Today, on Mother's Day, we dedicated James and Ethan to God. For those who are not familiar with it, it symoblizes our recognization to God that he gave us such a wonderful gift that we now are dedicating/ returning them to Him. One of the first moms in the bible was Hannah.We publically pronounced that we will do all in our power to bring them to know God and Jesus. As parents we strive for this daily and just pray that we can set the example for our boys to be strong men of faith, to not give into temptation, to stand up for what is right, to be good spouses one day. Also I pray for the right reaction and discipline when we or they fail at these things. We just pray that they will accept God and Jesus in their heart and live life in a positive way. We know that they are not perfect and they will face hard times but I pray that as parents we can guide them and comfort them during those times. But just as there are hard times there are many joyous times that we will celebrate together.

We were so blessed to be able to do this in Alabama. Because Shawn deployed when James was 2 months old and returned when he was 18 months followed by a move to GA and then to AL, we just weren't able to do it earlier. Our entire family joined us in this special day. Grandparents, Aunt, Uncles, and Cousins were all there! It was so nice having both sides there at one time. Although at times I got stressed because I am a planner and not everyone understands that and respects the need for me to plan all and all it was a special day.

This is my first Mother's Day as a mommy of 2. I know that at times I complain about being a SAHM, the late nights of no sleep, etc but I wouldn't trade it for the world. To be given the opportunity to be home and not have a "fill in" mom with my children is the best feeling in the world. Although not everyone has the opportunity to stay home I know that I am blessed to stay home with them. I love watching them grow and learn new things. I love how smart and kind James is (well most of the time). I love how snuggly Ethan is and how his smile makes me smile. I love watching my two boys interacting even with Ethan only being 9 months old. The decision to have a 2nd was a very difficult one for me...everyone who knows me knows this. But I can honestly say I can't imagine life without my 2 boys and to give James a sibling is awesome. I hope that they will share a strong bond as brothers and be the best of friends. I hope that they will select women who will accept me as their mother in law and that I don't overstep boundaries but that I am allowed to be as active in their lives as possible. I understand that the bond between mothers/daughters and mothers/sons is very different. I accept that and am not nieve. 'A son is a son until he finds a wife, a daughter is a daughter all her life'. I can't imagine life without my boys...and yes for the record we are done :)

SOLD!!!

We got news today that our house in NC is officially off the market! The guy who has been rented it got his loan approval today which is GREAT news for us. We will close very soon and have the burden of two payments each month gone!! We put our house on the market in July of 2008 and just now will we not have the burden of 2 payments. God is good!! We didn't make much off the house but to have the worry gone is priceless.



Although it is no longer our home, it will always hold a special place to us. It was our first home purchase as a couple. I admit when it came time to sign the first time I couldn't do it...we pulled into the parking lot and anxiety hit in and I had to reschedule. But once we did and the home was OURS it was a very great feeling. It was more than a house to us it was a HOME for us. Our precious first born was taken home there. It was there that we rocked our baby to sleep, where he began crawling and just had that feeling of home. His first bedroom was done by us in Winnie the Pooh and was a little labor of love. When we decided to paint the entire house neutral, that was the only room that kinda saddened me to see done. It is in that house that I learned so much about myself while Shawn was deployed. I learned that I could do so much more than I gave myself credit. It was there that I learned the joys and pains of motherhood. It is that house that after 15 LONG months in Afghanistan that Shawn returned safely to his family.


Now we hope that "our" house will hold memories for the new person living in it. I am so thankful for the answered prayers...even though it wasn't on our time and much of our savings was depleted....we know God does things in his own time for a reason.

Take Me Out To The Ball Game

Tonight we had James first official T-ball game due to rainout on Saturday. All day I will ashamely admit I was hoping for rain so I could go to the gym and not go to the "boring" ball field....although T-ball was my idea :). Shawn feels like he is too young to understand but my thinking is "so what." It will be fun and a good learning experience for him plus who knows if Shawn will be here next year when tball season rolls around so lets just do it :). But the rain stayed away, so game on! It was unseasonably chilly this day so we all put long sleeve t's under our DODGERS tshirts. James was so excited. We loaded up the minivan and made our way to the ballpark. Aunt Andrea was there waiting on us to arrive. She wouldn't dare miss James first tball game. Once we arrived the sportsplex was so big I had to call Coach to see where we were playing. We finally arrived in the dugout and the tball mom in me came out!! I loved it...I would yell for him to pay attention or run the base or good job!! It was so great to see how these little guys played. Sadly only 4 of our team member showed up which I was a bit disappointed about but it was still fun. The other team had a massive number of players :(

James was first put on 3rd base which for some reason the ball NEVER goes that direction. He had is typical meltdown of crying and whining as he is known to do lately. I send Shawn out there to give him encouragement but it isn't working. Then it's time for his team to bat and another meltdown because he isn't batting first!! By this point I was so upset at his behavior and lack of teamwork I told him if he couldn't dry it up that we would be done with tball for the year. Finally it was his time to bat and he hit it so well!! He was confused at where to run and when but he'll get the hang of it. Luckily this year it is all about fun and not keeping score.

After their turn to bat James got to play 2nd base and he got to catch several balls and throw them to the umpire. His team did very well about not all running towards the ball and going only if it came towards them as taught in practice. I enjoyed myself so much more than I thought I would be. Lesson learned:stay open minded about new experiences!!

Shawn filled me in that leagues like these are all pretty much political gains. Coaches "preselect" their teams so to say. However, our team might be considered the leftovers but I think we are a good tball team and it is a great learning experience for us all. Our coach is very patient and positive which is awesome. It makes me not want to play in the future because it seems so unfair...I guess mainly because we will never know anyone to get onto the "good" teams due our moving around so often. But I guess at the end of the day it doesn't matter, what matters is that our team plays fair, enjoys themselves, plays using teamwork and gives it all they got!! What more can you ask for?! Yup I see a future in the ball fields for sure!

After his first game we went to Logans and ate way too much food. James was so stinking cute in his tball jersey!!

30 is the new 20...right?!

I celebrated my 30th birthday on the 19th of this month. Shawn surprised me by invited some of my friends to celebrate with us at Casa Mexicana. I was so thrilled that my friends were there because this will probably be the last time we are in Alabama for a birthday celebration!! Shawn chose a yellow rose cake that was so yummy. I love yellow roses so he did great! I loved not only having my friends with me but their kids, it just shows how much we have changed over the years we still remain close.

A lot of my friends were so anxious about turning 30....me not so much. I think that I am very content with where I am at this age. I am doing exactly what I wanted to be doing at this age...being a mommy to my 2 children. I married a wonderful man so that checked that one off my list :). I never thought I'd marry a military man because I am not one who deals with change very well. Hey no wise cracks from those who know the background :) I feel that by marrying Shawn that I have met and seen places of the world I wouldn't normally see thanks to the Army. The deployments and long work hours are very difficult at times but I know that God will take care of our family. I always said I wanted to have my kids by age 30 and God blessed me with two beautiful boys. Yes I would love a baby girl but obviously that's not in our plans Shawn and I discussed and agreed that once I had kids that I would stay home until they were school age or old enough to tell me what was happening at daycare....make sure they weren't being mistreated. We have been very blessed to have the means to do that and not worry so much about financial stresses...especially in today's economy.

My next 30 years I hope to raise my boys in a Godly manner and for them to know and love God. If I can achieve this then I feel there is nothing else that I can't do. I would love to start running some races,starting with 5k and going from there maybe. I would love to pursue a Master's in Social Work so that I can work on post and help soldiers and eventually open a house for pregnant teens in foster care to help them be able to raise their own children successfully. Big plans yes but that is my dream....you never know. In 2 more years I'll celebrate 10 years with Shawn and I hope he is not deployed so we can go on a tropical vacation without kiddos and just enjoy being a couple!!

I am so blessed to be given the family that I have. I feel like the luckiest girl alive and know that I have so much more than I deserve.

Back to Bragg

While we were so close to Ft. Bragg I had to visit. Something about that area is "home" for me. I miss the military atmosphere as well as the lack of drama which encompasses the Shoals Area. We drove thru our old neighborhood and showed James where he lived his first year of life and where he was born at Ft. Bragg. Of course he wasn't thrilled but I found myself getting flooded with memories that left a smile on my face. Ft. Bragg has not seen the hits in the economy like other areas in the world because of the soldiers. Business were popping and traffic was constantly flowing. We visited the PX which I loved and miss! Everyone keeps asking if we will get stationed back at Bragg and we keep saying we don't know. The Army is certain for one thing.."hurry up and wait" so we will not know until November our next duty station. As much as I love being here I am sort of ready to leave North Alabama (I know once I am gone I'll wish I was back here) just because all the drama and everyone in everyone's business!! I do like being around family (most of the time) and especially in those moments when you just need someone who understands you. Shawn's fishing keeps him away a lot so being able to drive 15 min to my mom's or sisters is so enjoyable!!! But we know this is just another resting place in our journey with the Army!

We were able to meet up with my bestie in NC, Beth and her family. I miss her so much. She is due with her 2nd baby in May and I am so excited for her yet sad I won't be there. She was a huge part of my life from Shawn's first deployment to being James first babysitter at only 3 weeks old.

The Thursday before leaving we found out that Shawn made the Major promotion list!! WE were thrilled and caught off guard because he was double below the zone. We didn't get our hopes up s when the list was released and he was on it we were ecstatic. Of course he won't offically be promoted until his number comes up...hopefully within 6 months while we are still here so we can be surrounded by family during the ceremony.